How Can You Tell/ Handle It When A Visitation Client Is Lying To You?

In your gut, you think the visitation parent may be lying to you. Your gut isn’t enough to go on, but you shouldn’t discount it either.

Here are simple guiding questions and principles to help address this issue:

a) Is there supporting or contradictory evidence to your suspicions?
b) Stay open and objective to the actual evidence or facts.
c) Determine if the lie matters (i.e. Was the lie about the parents late arrival or an emotionally harmful statement the parent made to the child?
d) Will the lie change potential visitation outcomes?
e) Will the lie have an impact on the child-parent relationship?
f) If the lie can be confirmed and has a negative impact on the visitation, consider implementing L13 of the Uniform Standards of Court 5.20 (allowing a Provider to set additional rules both parties must follow).


*Post inspired by James Pitman, Ph.D

Child Pronography Facts

A study funded by Congress shows 99% of child pornography collections have images showing the sexual abuse of very young children. Less than 1% of child pornography collections limit themselves to nude or semi-nude photos, according to the study conducted in 2001:
• 83% contain images of children 6-12 years old,
• 39% had images of children 3-5 years old,
• 19% had images of children younger than 3.
The vast majority of child pornography collections show children being brutally sexually assaulted:
• 80% of collections seized had photos showing sexual penetration, and
• 21% of collections showed images of physical assault and torture.

To view Part I of this video click on the below link.

For more information about this video, please contact: Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention 810 Seventh Street NW. Washington, DC 20531 202–307–5911


2015 Won’t Last Forever…the spirit of The Entrepreneur!

Ready. Get set. GO!

Howz your 2015 going so far? Have you started those New Year Resolutions YET?

Well if by chance you haven’t, here’s your REMINDER…..Dreams without GOALS or Goals with ACTION are just wishes.

That’s the motivation behind this issue. It’s YOUR time. Go for it. 
Has your MIND been thinking about YOUR goals but you don’t seem to be able to go from thought to execution? Perhaps you should think about the execution rather than the goal. “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve (orexecute).Thoughts are things! And powerful things at that, when mixed with definiteness of purpose, and burning desire, can be translated into riches.” ~ Napoleon Hill.

You might be surprised at how close you are…how good you are…at having that business, that bakery service, or turning your job experience into that book or e-book online at Really? Yes, REALLY! Others are making it happen. Why not YOU?

To quote another favorite motivator, Zig Ziglar, “You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win.” Now don’t let the PP & E plan scare you. It doesn’t have to. Successful people become successful step-by-step. Next year you’ll be a year older; why not be a year older using one of YOUR natural gifts to create a financial future for yourself, your family, your children. I did. That’s why I know YOU can.

Many of you reading this newsletter have had the firm, funny and motivating opportunity of meeting me in one of the Professional Effective Supervised Visitation trainings (and it’s been a delight), but for others, this may be your FIRST time experiencing mespeaking of your entrepreneurial spirit. See, I believe, we don’t just simply wake up one morning and find ourselves successful. Wouldn’t THAT be awesome? No, actually, successful people wake up every day, living every moment, moving towards their desire to BE MORE, DO MORE, and GIVE MORE. But that takes WORK. Success only comes before work in the dictionary.

Some years ago, over 5 yrs to be exact, I walked into my corporate sales training office where I was the #1 sales representative only to be laid-off that same day. Yikes, right? Oooh yeah. I had worked for the training company nearly 9 years and in one hour, it was over. After a few deep breaths and, yes, prayer, I knew I had a choice to make. For me it was, go to work, but for ME this time ’round. So I got started. I took what Ialready knew how to do (sales and training) and made it a business. Now there were plenty of ‘steps’ along the way, a lot of them, but I believed as long as I follow the ‘model’ it would HAVE to work out. I found someone I could imitate (the company that laid me off….LOL) and followed their steps. Do you have anybody you can imitate who IS successful (it could be a big name like Mrs. Fields Cookies, or Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg or….even a neighbor). The point is, find a model and follow it.

Listen, there is NO magic potion, vitamin supplement, or free download… only believing YOU CAN. Believing that you can turn your knowledge, natural gift, or talent into a source of income. It’s POSSIBLE. I’ve met and talked with a lot of you, and I have heard your rich backgrounds (teachers, therapists, health care, foster parent, city employee 10+ years, law enforcement, grad student, and if you’re unemployed, you should be first in line for this). Today is a DIFFERENT day for entrepreneurs. The Internet made this POSSIBLE. Thousandnaire’s (to coin a new phrase) are being birthed every day because people put their ideas, knowledge and experience on the Internet as a service or a product. It is POSSIBLE. I believe it.Do you?

Establish a NEW you

It’s easy to buy a new dress or a new suit so the outside looks successful. Who hasn’t tried that? But therein lies the trouble: While it’s easy to ‘look’ successful outwardly, it’s not so easy to ‘be’ successful inwardly. The secret could mean establishing a NEW you. And then stick to it.

Here are 5 Life Principles to assist in establishing the NEW you:

1. “Stop to Start.” Stop procrastinating and START where you are.  Take control. Move forward, one step at a time. Daily. Stop talking about “some day when” and Start talking as though you ARE already doing ‘it’. No guts, no glory. If you have the guts, eventually you will get the glory.

2. “Have More Faith Than Feeling.” Nobody accomplishes their goals because they ‘feel’ like it. People don’t just wake up and say to themselves, I ‘feel’ like being an entrepreneur today and voila, it happened. If only feelings were required a person could be successful overnight. It’s a strong belief that although you don’t see the results, yet, you have faith that the results are on the way (like small seeds planted last year for this year’s harvest). With the attitude that it’s already happening even though you don’t see all the details, sets you apart from those who first have to ‘see’ to believe.

3. “Good agreements make good partners.” Enter agreements not for money sake but because the agreement is the right fit for you. Don’t compromise values or principles. They’re the main ingredient in success.

4. “Opportunities Lie Within Every Obstacle.” It can be tough to dig deep and find the positive, especially when confronted by challenges. But if you choose the positive, you will find the opportunity and nuggets of wisdom in every obstacle that presents itself in your life. –Jen Groover

 5. “The quality of being there is the process of getting there.” This is where every step comes in. It’s not the quality that matters but the PROCESS. Processmakes quality. In that order. In this New Year, if you will allow yourself to walk through the process of going after what you want and truly commit, plan, prepare and execute, I promise you, you will have results. Successful results. The NEW you will become established. Next time this year, you won’t simply be a year older but older and successful. It’s up to you. Believe you already have what it takes, because You do!

Here’s to a revenue generating 2015!

Tamara L. Daniels

P.S. Upcoming 2015 Professional Visitation
Monitor Trainings 

March 19th-21st
April 23rd-25th
May 14th-16th

5 Great Things About Being a Visitation Monitor

#1 – Love. You’ll love the kids and the kids will love you.
#2 – Giving. As in giving back. There’s nothing that compares to giving back to the society you rent free space from.
#3 – Purpose. A chance to do something that is real, meaningful and valuable; making a difference in the lives of children.
#4 – Financial. Every time you accept a new client, you’re increasing your revenue. Cash to your bottom line still count!
#5 – Success. Having your very own part-time business is liberating. You just might be the one to take it to the next level, like Maria did.

Speaking of success….

Monitor Trainee Success Stories


  • Jennifer Nash. Jennifer has a few words to say about her experience as a visitation monitor…”Tamara,  
I want to thank you so very much for all the support you’ve given me. Becoming a professional monitor has changed my life. The family that I’ve had the joy of working with has given me a job that I look forward to. Tamara you are an exceptional woman and I am so grateful that you were my trainer in becoming supervising child monitor. Much Appreciation.
  • Wild Iris Crisis and Counseling Center (Mammoth Lakes, CA.) 
    “Hi Tamara – How are you? Our SVM program has really taken off, and we are doing quite well. In fact, we have the Courts applying for a grant for us so that we can have even more funding for the program.” –Susi Bains, Program Director 
  • Theresa Lindsay. Theresa is on her waaaaay. She has just finished her brand new website. Congratulations Theresa!

Theresa graduated in July 2014 and has ALREADY come up with a name for her monitoring service, created a website, and is off and running. Check out Theresa’s website:

  • Andy Lugo – has his first NEW registry client.

Andy graduated in June 2014 and shadowed me during 2 parent Intakes and even conducted part of the non-custodial Intake. Great job Andy! Andy is now monitoring a case every Sunday for 3 hours. Check out Andy’s website at  Congratulations Andy!

  • Whitney Willis – is on her 4th client. She’s had some doozies, too.

Whitney graduated some months ago and took a while getting started but when she DID, she was on it. Whitney regularly writes to me looking for ways to improve the excellent service she already provides. Whitney has had a few challenging cases, but she stands her ground and keeps her clients in compliance with our industry guidelines. Way-to-go, Whitney!

The Growth Motivator’s Success Gems

Gem # 1 – Exhibit Leadership ‘where you are’, now:The quality of your life is determined by what you’re doing right now.

  • What part of YOUR success are you working on? If it’s to author a book someday, are you writing 30 minutes a day?
  • If it’s to own your own business, have you created the product? are you working on your website?
  • Leaders don’t do what they want to do, they do what they have to do. NOW.

Gem #2 – Have a Game Plan:

  • How many times have you heard that one? You keep hearing it because it’s, necessary.
  • Either you schedule success or you plan failure, but you can’t do both.
  • Ask yourself, “What am I doing daily that is getting me closer to success?”
  • Stop talking. Start doing.
  • Get a business coach. Make an appointment with a Small Business Development Center (SBDC). It’s free!

Gem #3 – Find someone in business that you admire, and follow them.

They say, “imitation is the best form of flattery”. Do you have a successful person you can follow (imitate)? If you don’t have one, FIND ONE. We’re not talking about ‘copying’ their craft; that’s not cool. The key is to apply the success tools they use, read the books they read, ask questions, wait for answers. Seek and ye shall find. Knock hard enough and the doors will open.